LEARNING TO SAY “NO”

How many times we say: “yes”, but would like to say: “no”. We often allow ourselves to get trapped by other people’s demands and forget to pay homage to our inner being.

“There are times when it is necessary to say: “no”, if someone is expecting us to do something or behave in a certain way that we know is not “dharmic” or correct for our spiritual progress” (Phyllis Krystal)

If we listened to our own conscience and obey its commands we would be surprised at the turnaround of events. Others would most certainly stop “controlling” or “interfering” with “our” will.

“We must make sure to speak and act in such a way that we will not cause harm to the other person.”(Phyllis Krystal). Remaining calm, speaking in an unemotional way, keeping our voice low yet carrying authority, will help us be in a much better position to make our point.

As adults, we have the power to create the life we truly want. It is our life, our decisions. No matter how important other people or situations are to us, we need to do what feels right to us.

“Take the first step in faith. You don´t have to see the whole staircase. Just take the first step.” Martin Luther King

Most people are concerned with what others will say. That is a fallacy. We need to be true to our own conscience in order to flourish and be happy from the inside. When we listen to other people and do as other people say we are breaking the “law” of our hearts.  Opening the heart to our Self allows for creativity, inner happiness, and a big smile to brighten our lives. And as we do this, others will respect us.

“The discipline must come from within, not from without; people must control themselves through their own innate strength, not get controlled through fear of someone or desire for temporary gain. Self-control promotes self-reliance, self-knowledge and self-advancement.” Sathya Sai Baba

Taking decisions based on right conduct and truth will bring positive results in our life. Hence, it will make us self-reliant and mature for future decision-making.

Few simple steps will help us tune with our Inner Self:

1. Meditation: listening to our own voice and putting into practice what it says.

2. Setting achievable goals and working towards it.

3. Learning to say NO. Nothing other than the Higher Consciousness should have power over us.

“So what can we do when under pressure from someone? It involves seeking within to determine whether we should agree to the other´s request or if we should refuse. This takes courage, but the positive results are well worth the effort. It is a difficult lesson to learn, as it involves letting go of the old habit of trying to please others for fear of the possibility of having their anger directed against us. Who is our authority, other people or our own inner mentor?”  Phyllis Krystal

Bindu Dadlani

 

 

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